


A Reylo pet peeves story

by Neuvoreylogirl



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Crack, Giggling, alpha and omega cliches, bensplaining, bottoms out, fashion label dropping, full blown pupils, maker, misunderstanding of genetic multiple birth, orbs, peanut - Freeform, petite Rey when she’s not, random sexual partner, tagged shipping pairs who barely appear, too much slow burn, uncharacterised gay best friend, virgin sex god, whilst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-05
Updated: 2019-10-05
Packaged: 2020-11-23 23:42:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20898065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neuvoreylogirl/pseuds/Neuvoreylogirl
Summary: So this is a bit of crack based offViWiWrites’ Twitter threadaround pet peeves in Reylo fandom. But let me preface this by stating there is not a single ‘peeve’ here I haven’t absolutely LOVED in the context of a story before. There is a reason certain phrases, character and plot tropes are used again and again - because they’re awesome!! And also pretty standard in the romance genre.If you are a Reylo fanfic writer, I frickin’ love you. You give us glorious free content in every genre we may desire, and I am so very, very grateful. Please don’t take this as anything other than tongue-in-cheek crack of every trope flung together at once. Because I WORSHIP you.





	A Reylo pet peeves story

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a bit of crack based off [ViWiWrites’ Twitter thread](https://twitter.com/viwiwrites/status/1180126512919568386?s=21) around pet peeves in Reylo fandom. But let me preface this by stating there is not a single ‘peeve’ here I haven’t absolutely LOVED in the context of a story before. There is a reason certain phrases, character and plot tropes are used again and again - because they’re awesome!! And also pretty standard in the romance genre.  
If you are a Reylo fanfic writer, I frickin’ love you. You give us glorious free content in every genre we may desire, and I am so very, very grateful. Please don’t take this as anything other than tongue-in-cheek crack of every trope flung together at once. Because I WORSHIP you.

_Gosh_, thought Rey whilst dressing her petite form in her Chanel suit._ I wish I wasn’t still a_ _virgin_. She slipped on her jimmy choos that matched her Prada handbag which also looked good with her Louboutins. _It’s been 35 chapters and Kylo just stares intensely and explains stuff! _

Just then her gay BFF Finn entered.

“Hi Peanut!” he said.

“Hi yourself” giggled Rey.

Finn left to continue being her gay best friend.

There was a knock at the front door and it was Ben Solo. He stared at her intensely from his asymmetrical ugly but sexy face.

“Rey I believe it’s time you lost your virginity to me because I think we might be alpha and omega. I wish to bottom out inside you and gaze at your full blown pupils and jiggly twin orbs.”

“Oh yes Alpha knot me,” Rey breaths.

He picked her up and inserted her on his cock, feeling her maiden hood break, and knew he really was her first. And although a virgin himself Ben knew exactly how to rub her clitoris while thrusting to give her immediate multiple orgasms.

“Oh maker!” cried Rey.

And then Luke Skywalker materialised as a ghost and had sex with them too.

“May the Force be with you,” he said and disappeared.

Finn came back.

“Hi peanut I’m still gay!“ he said.

With Finn was his boyfriend Poe who was also gay. And also Rose and Hux, Kaydel and Snap Wexley, Mitaka and Bazine, and Phasma and Snoke.

“Oh I’m pregnant with twins!” Rey exclaimed.

“It’s because they run in my family,” explained Ben.

And they all lived happily ever after.


End file.
